It’s been two months since Guppy’s stranding, not a day goes by that I don’t think about her being smashed up and down on the reef tearing apart more and more. Tearing my heart up in pieces at the same time. The memories I have, every singly cm2 of Guppy that I’ve looked after and cared for like it was my baby..
The more I think about it the less I understand the set of actions that have brought her to this point. The stupid mistakes, the lack of communication and sheer ignorance of advice I kept giving. I just can’t understand it, it doesn’t come through my head how people could possibly be so careless with such a valuable object. How they could see Guppy just see as a meaningless thing. I can’t explain how much I loved this boat, how much she meant to me and how much it meant for me to let her sail away under LifeSails care so she could inspire more kids to live their dreams. It may sounds strange to a landlubber but so it is.

My trust has again been scattered, broken – smashed to pieces. There where so many promises-that they would look after her and never let anything happen to her, that they would keep me updated and take my advice. None of the promises and explicit agreements made they have kept.
From LifeSails recent blog I understand they decided to scuttle Guppy sadly without giving notice to me. The already bad communication quickly got to a stage of no communication. Through calling people on the island and other sources I got some info but still, even after two months didn’t get an update from LifeSail and only after repeatedly asking for it did I get a weak ‘’sorry’’ and 3 photo’s 3 weeks later.

But besides their untruthful update on Facebook and the Blog I haven’t had any details about Guppy from them!
From their recent blog I also understand now that the engines wont start, it’s the first time I’ve heard this from LifeSail.
I still don’t understand how they’ve managed to wreck both engines within two months after I’ve used them for 8 years without ANY trouble…
The engines have completely seperate systems, seperate fuel tanks, batteries, intakes, filters no connection at al to make sure in case of failure from one the other one always remains in working order. Besides that Guppy is a super sailboat and within seconds you could unfurl the jib and sail away!
Nor can I understand how they could let Lori skipper Guppy alone – with such little sailing experience it was simply asking for an accident to happen. Why didn’t they ask me what I thought? Why didn’t they listen to my advice.. How could she anchor in such an impossible place? It’s unbelievable that they used Guppy just as a fun holiday, cruising around the islands for so long that the hurricane season started in the northern hemisphere and they couldn’t safely continue to Hawaii.  

The fact that Guppy is gone and I had no say in what happened leaves my heart broken already – but how an organisation can be so cruel as to just plainly ignore me and the explicit agreements made.., this leaves me wounded inside far more, far deeper and probably for much longer..
Not a day passes that I don’t see Guppy crying and screaming on the reef, not a day passes that I wish I could turn things back, that I woud have seen earlier that the promises LifeSail have made were all  just show and in vain. I think about the great work Guppy could have done, how many life’s she could have changed. All these dreams and thoughts are now floating around in the warm clear blue water of Manihiki between the wrecked pieces of my beloved Guppy..
Not because of an accident but out of a lack of competence, respect & communication on Lori Kallestad ,Matt Schulz & LifeSails behalve.

Laura